Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Couples Therapy

Oh, Trail Running! Why do you hate me so! Today’s hidden trip, slimy-root slip, knee smash, face-plant in the mud on my lunch-time run was totally uncalled for. I know our relationship can be Rocky at times but this latest abuse is the last straw! That’s it, Trail Running. I’m walking out on you!

Why do you torture me the way you do? Is it because you’ve caught me doing all kinds of OTHER running? I swear I only Road Run when your woods are too buggy and I only Snowshoe Run when your paths are iced over. And, you know I wouldn’t be caught dead with that slut – “treadmill run”! You never know who she’s been with!

I’m not sure what more I can do in this relationship. I go out of my way to please you. I always tread softly upon your paths and spend hours grooming your trails. And, in my business profession I try to make sure to only specify the greenest of building products. Heck I even host a Race Series in your honor – and this is the thanks I get?!?

What’s that you say? You don’t mean to hurt me? You lovingly cushion my stride with every step on your soft, velvety trails? You try to reach out and hold me, but I always pass you by? The scrape on my shin and the bruise on my knee are just your way of showing affection – a tender “kiss” to remember you by?

Oh, Trail Running! I never knew how much you cared! I can’t believe I ever thought ill of you. All along you were just trying to toughen me up and show me that I truly belonged amongst your deepest, darkest woods. I know with help we can work out whatever obstacles stand in our way. Oh, Trail Running! I love you so!!! Let's never fight again.

Patty B. was right. I guess love really IS a battlefield!

No comments:

Post a Comment